Want to Play Golf on Our Holiday? Here Are My Conditions

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Want to Play Golf on Our Holiday? Here Are My Conditions

And perhaps this is how a successful golf holiday should begin.

Not with the golfer deciding where everyone is going because a famous course happens to be there. Not with the promise that “you can use the spa while I play.” And definitely not by informing the family, once the flights have been booked, that the resort happens to have three championship courses.

Let everybody else choose too.

AmerExperience Research™ has compared leading golf destinations around the world, including something that matters enormously when golfers travel with partners and families: what is there to do when you are not playing golf?

Have a look at our research into the world’s best golf destinations. But this time, don’t start by looking at the golf.

Look at the destination.

Then ask the most important question:

“Honey, which one do you like?”

Rule Number One: This Is Our Holiday

There is a subtle difference between asking:

and asking:

The second question may produce a much happier household.

The partner or family chooses somewhere they genuinely want to visit. Once the destination has been chosen, the golfer can investigate the small matter of whether there happens to be a good course nearby.

Fortunately, when you browse the AmerExperience Golf™ destination guides, there usually is.

The arrangement is wonderfully democratic.

Your partner chooses the destination. You choose the tee time.

Everybody wins.

At least in theory.

“I Want Spain.”

Excellent choice.

The Costa del Sol presents one of the easier negotiations.

The non-golfer isn’t being sent to a golf resort to find something to do for five hours. The Mediterranean coast is the holiday.

Marbella, Málaga, Mediterranean beaches, old towns, restaurants, tapas, shopping and Andalusian culture can easily fill a week without anybody needing to know the difference between a birdie and a bogey.

Meanwhile, the golfer has access to one of Europe’s great concentrations of golf courses.

Negotiations concluded.

The important part is the order in which the decisions were made.

Spain came first. Golf came second.

“What About Miami?”

Now we are getting somewhere.

Miami is almost unfairly convenient for this experiment because nobody needs golf as an excuse to go there.

Beaches. Restaurants. Shopping. Art. Architecture. Boat trips. The Everglades. Miami Beach. Cuban culture. Nightlife.

A family can disagree about what to do in Miami for an entirely different reason: there are too many choices.

And somewhere among all this, Florida happens to contain an extraordinary amount of golf.

Experienced golfers will recognize that an early tee time is now under threat.

This is called compromise.

“Show Me Mauritius Again.”

This may be where the golfer realizes that the negotiating strategy has become dangerously expensive.

Mauritius offers beaches, warm Indian Ocean water, resorts, food, nature, excursions and the unmistakable feeling that you have travelled somewhere special.

It also has excellent golf.

But do not lead with that.

Let Mauritius do the selling.

Take the victory.

Mauritius demonstrates the basic principle particularly well: choose a destination where golf is only one part of a much bigger journey.

Nobody should feel that their role on holiday is waiting for somebody else to finish the 16th hole.

“Portugal Sounds Nice. Where Are We Staying?”

This is an important question.

The Algarve can be magnificent for a mixed golf holiday: beaches, coastal towns, Portuguese food, boat excursions, dramatic cliffs and plenty of places worth exploring.

It also contains enough golf to make certain golfers lose perspective.

This is where the family should retain veto power.

There are excellent reasons to choose the Algarve. But if you are travelling with people who don’t play, the base matters.

A golfer may consider proximity to the first tee an important geographical advantage.

Other human beings sometimes prefer proximity to restaurants, beaches, towns and life.

Both viewpoints deserve consideration.

“Scotland? Isn’t It Going to Rain?”

Possibly.

But now the golfer has a much stronger case than golf alone.

Edinburgh. Historic towns. Castles. Whisky. Highlands. Coastlines. History. Restaurants. Extraordinary landscapes.

Scotland is one of those destinations where golf belongs to the identity of the place rather than existing separately from it.

At this point the golfer should stop talking.

Knowing when negotiations have succeeded is an important relationship skill.

The Children Have Entered the Negotiations

Couples are one thing.

Children introduce an entirely different legal system.

Children possess surprisingly accurate historical records.

Therefore, family golf travel requires a different principle: everybody gets something they actually want.

Not something adults have decided they should want.

A beach day. A water park. A boat trip. Wildlife. An amusement park. Snorkelling. A football match. Whatever fits the destination and, more importantly, the children.

This can produce sophisticated international diplomacy.

Sign the treaty.

The AmerExperience Family Golf Agreement

That last rule applies only to the relationship.

Obviously you are keeping your golf score.

There Is Actually Some Psychology Behind This

Underneath the jokes is a serious point.

People don’t necessarily need to spend every moment of a holiday together for the trip to feel meaningful. Expectations, autonomy, shared experiences, stress and relationships can all influence how we experience travel.

We explored those questions more seriously in The Psychology of Travel: How Travel Affects Well-Being, Stress and Relationships.

And that gives us a better way of thinking about the traditional golfer/non-golfer problem.

The objective shouldn’t be to find something to keep the non-golfer occupied.

They are not waiting-room furniture.

The objective is to choose a destination where everybody has reasons of their own for wanting to be there.

Sometimes you explore together. Sometimes you eat together. Sometimes you spend the entire day together. And sometimes one person plays 18 holes while everybody else does something they genuinely wanted to do anyway.

Then you meet again and have stories to tell each other.

That can be a very good holiday.

So, Honey, Where Do You Want to Go?

Start with the AmerExperience Research™ into the world’s best golf destinations.

But don’t only look at the golf.

Look at the beaches. The cities. The restaurants. The culture. The landscapes. The activities. The experiences.

Ask your partner. Ask the children.

Once you have an answer, explore the AmerExperience Golf™ destination guides to see where to travel, what to experience and, yes, where to play.

Once everybody agrees on the destination, the practical planning becomes much easier.

Play, Stay and Experience the Destination

Once the family negotiations have concluded, build the trip around the destination — not only around the golf course.

Affiliate disclosure: Some booking links on this page are affiliate links. AmerExperience may earn a commission if you make a booking through them, at no additional cost to you.

The Best Golf Holiday May Not Be a Golf Holiday

Perhaps that is the whole secret.

Don’t ask your family to come on your golf holiday.

Ask them where they want to travel.

Let them look through the destinations. Let them choose something that excites them. Build a journey everyone actually wants to take.

Then ask the innocent little question:

Your partner chooses the destination. You choose the tee time. And everybody gets a holiday worth remembering.

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